How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

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Three men were on a plane. Oh wait. You probably already heard this one.

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Mom mom momie mom mom mom mom momie mother mother. What! Hi.

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What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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Q: What did the clam say to the postman? Moral: "Hey its me the worlds only talking clam! How you doing dude!"

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

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Ashton Kutcher meets a fine cougar at a bar and the cougar fatally wounded his throat.

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

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Man #1:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: I don't know Man #1: Because he died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Because he died? Man #1: Yep. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Really? Come on, I've already answered your stupid question. Man #1: JUST ANSWER! Man #2: Fine, because he died. Man #1: No, peer pressure. Duh. Man #2 promplty punches Man #1 in the face and continues about his buisness.

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Knock, knock. MAN: Who's there? ... MAN: Hello? Anyone out there? ... MAN: Must be the wind.

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How did Alice get revenge on Diane when Diane called her fat? When Alice was pregnant, she stabbed herself in the stomach and blamed it on Diane. Diane was then sent to prison for murder and received a sentence of 25 years. Alice laughed in court, and Diane was forced to commit suicide. Alice then stole Diane's husband, and she lived happily ever after.

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What do Lebron James and Bill Murray have in common? They are both black basketball players. Except for bill murray

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If I was in a room with hitler Osama bin laden and Justin bieber and a gun with 2 bullets. I would shoot Justin bieber twice

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What's faster than a Mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

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Yeah, but why is this honesty so important for you, personal reasons because you are like that, because you consider me a friend? Or because a single lie, could have catastrophical consequences?

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wat did one chicken say to the other bock bock

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Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

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how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

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What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

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how do u get the baby to stop choking? take ur dick out of its mouth!!!

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why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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