What do you say when you walk into an optical? "Hello, can I order a cheeseburger?"

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Q: How pregnancy test is performed in Somalia?! A: Shove a piece of bread between the legs of the women and if the bread is bitten when you take it out, she is pregnant!

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

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Whats red and dirty? Her period

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what has two feet and is black all over? your mom after she died in a horrific house fire.

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Whats tha difference between blacktop and an airplane wing??? Well, alot. I bet you knew that.

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me!

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The Jewish boy asks his dad for 50 dollars His dad says " 40 dollars? what do you need 30 dollars for? "

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

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What did the resently released criminal get for his birthday? a nice sweater

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Why can't Ray Charles see? Because he's dead.

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What do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot. WOW your racist!

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what does lady gaga and a vacuum have in common? nothing. lady gaga is a human and the other is a house hold item.

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What did Mel Gibson say to the African-American? I'm sorry

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How did the Mexican get into the United States? He applied for a Visa and was granted authorization to live and work in the United States on a permanent basis.

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What's funnier than a jalapeño? A jalapeño on a stick.

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why was the postman sad? because ran over a small child with his truck

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why did the black man cross the road? to get away from the racists

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Your moms so stupid she ate all the food in the grocery store

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What's white and sticky? A marshmellow.

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I used to say "I used to be an adventurer like you but then I took an arrow to the knee" like you but then I took an arrow in the knee.

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This is an anti-joke. It is not funny because "anti" means the opposite of something.

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Why didnt the poor black man have cell phone service? Because seven eight nine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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