A Vietnam war veteran accidentally goes to a Vietnamese concert and says, "I could take a lot of them down with me."

What did Osama say before he was shot? Nothing, it was a surprise attack.

Man: Knock knock Man 2: who's there Alzheimer's patient: to get to the other side!

Why is facebook ruining all of the world's social skills? Because Mark Zuckerberg has Asperger's.

What will you never see? A white Guy that can jump.

A Jew walks into a bar. It's a bar full of Neo-Nazis.

What do you call an African American woman with Tourettes? This question cannot be answered correctly. The African American woman was misdiagnosed. She is really a crack whore.

How do you make a person dissapear? You can't that would break the laws of physics, so therefore rendered impossibe.

Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

a guy walks into a bar. he buys several drinks, ends up drunk, and crashes into a coffee shop with a goat in the backseat.

What do you call a black man being raped by 6 members of the Ku Klux Klan? Rape

What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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