When life hands you lemons...you should probably get yourself checked out because life is an abstract idea...

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How do you kill a domb blond? Shoot her in the head.

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What did the fat confused man say? I am confused.

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Why did the girl make a sandwich for her boyfriend? Because she offered to make lunch in order to save money by not going to a restaurant.

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Q. Why did the television set turn on? A. Because someone pressed the power button.

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quantum physics?

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Christmas presents.

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Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was in the oven because the farmer was cooking it for dinner.

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What's black and has ne education? A tire.

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why are black people so good at sports? hard work and dedication

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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Why did the wolf cry boy? Cause he was a pedifile.

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KNOK KNOK WHOES THERE APPLE APPLE WHO SEE THIS IS Y U BROKE UP

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What's worse than The Holocaust? Nothing, The Holocaust was a dark and scary time.

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a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the span of 5 hours.

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why did Dayrl win the wheelchair race? Because he had working legs.

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Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

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What's the coolest place to be in the solar system? Uranus.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

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Your mom is soo black , she can go naked to a funeral.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

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A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops