How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

how did harry styles get in one diretion god

There once was a man named bulagala moo moo boom chicka boom. Sometimes, when wipe the toilet tissue breaks and my fingers get all dirty. Good thing I have insurance!

Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

A jewish man runs into a wall with an erection. He broke his nose.

What do you call it when a dead man has his wallet stolen? Rob Zombie.

Knock Knock who's there its black george washington.

Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

why did the homeless man die? because everyone does.

A bra walks into a dyslexic man.

How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? Trees can't jump

When life gives you lemons, go sell them for crack.

What's the difference between a book and a house? Their names

What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

what did the boy with dyslexia get for his birthday? bad grades

What do family members and a loaf of bread have in common? If you smash them with a hammer they die.

PROS = good things CONS = bad thing So, if PROgress is a good thing...then why is the US government call CONgress?

why couldn't the boy talk? Because he was dead

wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

There is a very old lady at the bottom of a long flight of steep stairs with a large amount of groceries piled up in her hands. How did she make it to the top?? She walked.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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