So a Jew is walking on the street and he sees a penny, and he decides to pick it up because ever since the fire that killed his family and burned his house down he has been living on the street and he needs all the help he can get.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

A man is walking on the beach and discovers a lamp in the sand. He takes it home to polish it. Eventually it looks like new and he gets a fairly reasonable price from an antique shop.

Boy: Knock Knock! Girl: Who's there? Boy: It's me, John. Girl: Oh, come in!

Why did the Mexican jump the fence? He was at his neighbors house and it was shorter to cut through yards than to walk to his house

what is the name of the book that helen keller wrote LADIUFgSLDGFhalkjgfvcgh

how do you kill a black guy ? AIDS

I? Everett

getting up in the morning is the 3nd hardest thing :DDD

What is the difference?

What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

Ask me if I'm a truck! Are you a truck?! No.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a school bus and died.

Don't you hate it when someone starts a sentence and doesnt fi...

Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

Why was Timmy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

What's grey and can't fly? A parking lot.

What kind of king has 2 heads? A card!

How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

A mother and her child run into the store... The mother opens the door, so the child does not run into the store again.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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