What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

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Why did the girl talk to her computer? Because she was Skyping with some faraway friends. Why were her friends far away? She was sent to the moon. Why was she sent to the moon? Because she tried to create eternal night.

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roses are red violets are blue im not good at poems so fuck you too.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

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A man walks into a bar... He has a severe drinking problem, and his wife weeps for him

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What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the lizard fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the moneky

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Q: Whats better than not being a Jew? A: Being a Jew.

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How do u save a black person from drowning? Take ur foot off the back of there head

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A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" the bartender asks. The horse kills everyone in the bar and stampedes the other horses into town.

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your mumma so fat when she stepped on the scales it said her phone number

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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guess what what ...

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When geese migrate, why is one side of the V longer than the other? There are more birds on that side.

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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why do black people like watermellon? becasue it is a delicious red fruit at a wonderful price

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a wanted serial killer on the run from the police

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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An over weight naked black guy walks into a bank and says "give me all your money!"

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Why don't Catholics allow people to wear condoms? Because they get stuck in the alter boys braces.

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A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

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Maths.

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What do you call a bunch of black people at the bottom of the ocean? Cocoa puffs

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What's worse than getting a apple and finding a worm in it. Getting hit in the face with a meteorite.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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