The Below statement is an antijoke. The Above statement is a joke.

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Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet, but she had anal hemorrhaging so it really hurt

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Q: Why were minorities denied access to the bathroom? A: It was for employees only.

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? Just in case he gets a hole in one! -LEts Go Mets P.S the comment below is also very stupid

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a tiger swims into the indian ocen and eats a tuna. the tiger shortly dies

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What do all homosexuals have in common? Not much.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

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Why did to plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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whats worse then getting a bad present on your birthday? dying.

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A Muslim walks into a Bar, He buys everyone a round of drinks and enjoys the rest of his night

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You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

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mary had a little lamb it's fleece was white as snow and everywhere that mary went it did a massive shit

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Knock knock Who's there The military, your son died last night.

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Why couldn't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? He was struck by a very serious disease, otherwise known as refrigerator to the face, at the age of 5.

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what did the poor guy get for christmas POVERTY

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How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

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why did the dog went inside the church? because the door was open.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? A miracle

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Dyslexic drunk died choking on his own vimto last night

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? ruh-ruh-blah-blah-bluh

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Have you heard of that new jewish car? No, have you? No.

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There once was the worlds most important people on an airplane. All of them. They were a Boy Scout with a hiking pack, World's Oldest person, World's Smartest person, a Scientist who had the cure to cancer, and the World's Richest man. The Pilot told them that the plane was running out of gas and they would have to bail. But there was a problem, two people were going to have to die. They were only two parachutes short. So the Scientist grabbed one and said, "I'm the only one with the cure to cancer I've got lives to save." And he bails. Then the World's oldest person jumps out with a parachute saying, "I Still Have A Life To Live!!!" Then the Richest person realizes there is two parachutes left. He says, "I have the most money so I have to go because I could save America from going bankrupt." Grabs a chute and jumps. Then, the world's smartest person just happens to be so selfish and bails with the last Parachute. So the Pilot and and the Boy Scout were left. The pilot was kind enough to let the Kid go because he still had he longest life to live. But the kid said no, we could both go. The pilot said no you go. The kid was still being stubborn. And said No, we could both go, The world's smartest person took my back pack, there is one chute left, we could share it. And so they both jumped and landed safely on the ground. And that was the end of the World's smartest man.

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A German, an Irishman, a Mexican and a Texan are flying together on an airplane over the ocean. When the plane begins to experience engine trouble, they find that there is only one parachute for the four of them! Through an amazing display of flying skill, however, the pilot is able to complete the flight and land safely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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