what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

knock knock... who's there? uninterrupted cow uninterrupted cow who?? exactly....

What did the first ant say to the second ant? Nothing. Ants are incapable of communicating via speech.

why did the firefighter let the fire burn... becuase of inattentivieness. he will soon be fired.

What did the old man say to the young man? Nothing, the old man was dead.

Whats black,white and red all over? A penguin in a blender

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being disturbed by two black guys raping a young girl with leukemia

What did the little calculator grow up to be? Nothing

an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

How do you kill a Chinese hobo Shoot him

What did the paper towel say to the tomato? Nothing.

Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a school bus and died.

Why did the bus drop his icecream? He was hit by a boy

Roses are Orange Violets are Green I'm Colorblind..

A hooded black man walks into a Convenience store. He orders a cup of hot chocolate as it is very cold outside.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Turns out he was needed immediately at a business meeting.

Where did the cow go? To the slaughter house!!!

Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

What do you call a Fly with no wings? Dead.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

My cat just died.

A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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