What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? Wanted by the police.

Why did Lucy drop her ice-cream ? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who is there ? NOT LUCY !

A guy walks up to a midget and he says: 'What do you want to be when you grow up?'

Why couldn't the blond dial 911? She lost her arms in a tragic car accident last year

Why was the giant centipede full? Because it just ate half a dozen purebred golden retriever puppies by hiding all day in the poopy newspapers and emerging at night to eat the defenseless baby dogs in their sleep. BUM BUM BUM KSSSH!

If the blue dog falls out of sample object, how many bananas does my mom eat? No, because markers can't talk

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the crossing gaurd allowed him to

A white horse walks into a bar and orders a bitter. The bartender says "Hey, do you know we've got a drink named after you?" The horse says; "Eeek! A talking cow."

Ok so 3 guys walk into a bar... the fourth one ran.

Billy Idol walks into a New York City Bar. He snorts lines of coke with his comrades in the bathroom and continues his night by having sex with attractive underage females

Why should you be scared when a black man asks you, "What are looking at?" Because if he is over the age of 18, he should know better than to end a sentence with a preposition, unless of course, he never had an education, in which case... you should probably run for your life.

As I sat waiting for the doctor to return with my final prognosis, I began contemplating my own mortality. Looking inside myself, one question continued to haunt me: “What’s the X-ray technician going to do when he walks in and sees me messing with the equipment?”

Why aren't there any painkillers in the jungle? because of the unethical and unscrupulous practices of big pharma

What do u call 2 black people in the front of a car 3 in the back and 2 on top of the car going off a clif? A waste u can fit 2 more in the trunk

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Dan walked into a jelly fish

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

your mama is so fat, she sat on the ipod touch and made the ipad.

A guy reads the bible Another guy shouts "spoiler alert, the main character dies"

Q: Were yyoouu talking smack about me? A: what? Q: did i studder? A:yeah you said yyoouu Q: well were ya A: no Q: oh ok.. A: k bye..

WARNING: this is a black joke Why does everybody hate darth vader? he is all black

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, It's none of my business.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut, you ***ing racist.

what's worse than a dead baby in the bathtub? if the baby was named Grace.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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