whats worse than getting ran over by a car seeing you mum having ***

Why would a baby cry? Because it's being put through a juicer.

What's the difference between tires and a black guy? Tires don't scream once there are chains around them. ;)

what did joe eat for breakfast? he didn't eat, joe is schizophrenic steve's best friend

What do you get when you cross a sheep with a lion? A dead sheep.

Why did Little Timmy eat Smarties before school? Because he was hungry.

A man walked into a bar, and clutched his stomach in pain as it was a steel bar and it hurts when you walk right into a steel bar.

A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

Are you from Africa because you sure look likes you've got Ebola

What do you call a terrible Therapist that shoots coke up his nose? Sickman, Sickman Fraud.

what do mr. potato head and micheal jackson have in common? their noses come off pretty easily

What's up with airplane food? Not sure, but last flight I was on they didn't serve any food. It could have been because it was too short of a flight or perhaps the recessed economy caused jetliners to cut costs. Either way, I didn't get a bag of peanuts.

A man walks into a bar. He tricks a lady into smelling a rag doused with chlorophoam, and rapes her.

Yo momma so fat, she was recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and is at great risk for developing heart disease!

Why did the elderly lady cross the road? Because an atomic bomb was exploding behind her

My girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her sexually. I told her she was beautiful and gave her flowers.

Where did the kid go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

what did the rapist say to the girl? get in the van

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They all gone.

rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

What's the difference between Newt Gingrich's cat and a hand grenade? Gingrich's cat is a domesticated quadriped mammal, a hand grenade is a small bomb that can be thrown by hand

Why did the chicken cross the road? Stop asking stupid questions.....

Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

Why was the 18 year boy afraid of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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