Why did the car break down? Because breakfast was done.

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whats long, hairy, and has one eye? my cat fluffy, he has cancer.

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What do you call a fat man who can turn slim? I don't know

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1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

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Why is Keven's name spelled with an E Because his parents are black.

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Things i love to hate: Conspiracy theorists Religious fundamentalists Hypocritical people Sally (she has no arms) People selling pyramid schemes Liars, con-artists, thieves. Rapists, child molesters, serial killers Terrorists, politicians, and keyboard warriors That is all.

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Shiiit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Taken from all sorts of species! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Bengal tiger, kangaroo, African elephant, blue whale too! Shit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-lala-lala!

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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Q: what did the emo girl use to check her email? A: A computer.

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They say that men are from Mars, and women are from Venus. If that is true, then who on Earth are we? [L]

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What do you call a black man in space An astronaut

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TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Sex

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Why was the black man running? Because he was playing capture the flag.

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A blonde walks out of a hair salon She had just dyed her hair.

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* two sisters are making yo mama jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

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What did Jamie get for Christmas? Nothing. Jamie is not friends with Christmas.

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Rebecca black walked into a bar. She was then escorted out because she is under-aged.

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What did the ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved

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Three blind mice. See how they run. Into things.

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Oh my god it's the twinkie mobile!

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What do you do when you find a black man rolling around on the ground? Stop laughing and reload.

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I scream, you scream, we all scream when hit by an ice cream truck

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So, I walked into my friends house and MAH DEDDEHS DECK was outside bruh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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