#Getweird

where's mom I killed her

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

How do you make a girl scout cry? Kill her family.

A witch walks into a bar and orders a drink. She gets her drink and proceeds to have a great time.

A Hispanic, a Caucasian, and an African American walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this, some kind of a joke?"

Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

How do you get Sally of the swing? Throw a clown at her.

Q: Why was the Asian teacher fired from her job? A: Because she always showed to school too late and to make matters worse the school had recently found out that she was a raging alcoholic.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

Something told me to write "vote pancakes" so I wrote "Vote Pancakes" it said it was wrong, and now I know why, capitals.

A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

Things i love to hate: Conspiracy theorists Religious fundamentalists Hypocritical people Sally (she has no arms) People selling pyramid schemes Liars, con-artists, thieves. Rapists, child molesters, serial killers Terrorists, politicians, and keyboard warriors That is all.

What's worse than finding your whole family dead? Nothing. Finding your family dead is terrible.

Once upon a time a guy took his pants off why because he was touching himself

What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

What did the chicken say to the duck .... Nothing the chickin was Spanish and the duck was illiterate

I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

whatdumb and gay stewart price

why did benny go to the 4th grade school nurse? he had a massive erection.

what happened to the chicken who crossed the road he didn't realize that the light was green

You walk into a shopping centre, what wont you see? Madelin McCann.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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