what do u call a kid at school a school kid and i have enough of these anti jokes they are not funny

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How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench isnt going anywhere.

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Q: What's worse than getting jury duty? A: Getting herpies from a rabbit

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how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

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What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? I shot him in the face.

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

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How do you entertain a bored pharaoh? (written in 1600 BCE - Westcar Papyrus) -You sail a boatload of young women dressed only in fishing nets down the Nile and urge the pharaoh to go catch a fish

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Whats worse than getting raped by a cow? Getting raped by two cows.

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Knock Knock!! Who's there? The Bailiffs, now get out.

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What do skeet disks and Jewish babies have in common? Hitler used to shoot them out of the sky.

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What happened to the guy who took more lineage then he should have? He went to sleep.

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What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck!

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What has one head, three eyes and seven legs? A cow with a tri-pod rammed up it's arse. The third eye is a result of a birth defect.

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What do you get when you cross a cow with an elephant? A deformed organism

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Barack Obama. Ok, come on in Mr. President!

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why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease, an STD from the chicken, as the chicken is a pimp) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A Refrigerator

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

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How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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What do you call a person with cancer A hospital patient, what did you expect? Oh. Of course you expected Chewbacca.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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