What did the homeless black guy write on his sign? need money for weed.

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A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

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What's worse than getting a apple and finding a worm in it. Getting hit in the face with a meteorite.

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How come Helen Keller didn’t scream when she fell off the cliff? Because at 19 months she contracted an illness that left her blind and deaf and therefore never learned to properly use her vocal cords

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What do you call a bunch of black people at the bottom of the ocean? Cocoa puffs

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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What do you call a cow with no legs. Dead, the farmer cut them off.

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Q:How many pieces of paper can one tree make? A:Trees cannot make paper, people make paper from trees. So the answer is none, a tree can't make any paper whatsoever.

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Q: What did the horse say to the other horse? A: Nothing, Horses are incapable of making verbal communication therefore they cant speak to each other.

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Maths.

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This week only, 2 for 1 misdemeanor shop lifting arrest. How can I do it? Because I can.

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A dog walks into a bar, the bartender asks, "why the long face?" The dog replies, "because I am a dog you idiot, my face always looks like this"

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Q. what did the hobo say to the rich guy A. nothing the hobo wa a mute

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How do chinese name their kids? They drop silverware

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Q:What business did the black man break into? A: The business of show, because he was a talented actor.

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i have a story to tell u!!! oh s*** i forgot!

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What do you call a bad joke website? anti joke

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Whats funny about a guinea pig water skiing? The part where he explodes.

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How many dead babies can you fit in an oven? Depends on if you put them in the blender first.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

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Why did the white policeman shoot all the black people in a house and not the white people Because the black guys were holding the white guys hostage

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Why can't monkeys and kuala bears get along? Because they are two entirely different species that cannot communicate with each other...

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A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

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Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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