What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

Why did the kid poop his pants? He was a baby

Q: Whats the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

What do you call a black guy eating fried chicken -A black guy being black

How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

Denard Robinson

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police your parents just died in a car accident

What did rangler get on anti joke? Thumbs down.

Listen Nero, you are the only one I suspect right now, how do you know all of this? Why should I believe you?!

Why was the old man lying on the floor? He had a heart attack and died

Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

Three black guys go to the mall, they proceed to have a grand time!

What happened to the woman driver who drove to Tesco? Due to the pleasant traffic conditions, she arrived slightly earlier than expected and she finished her weekly shop in forty minutes. She returned home, once again in good traffic and ate a delicious lunch of sausages and chips.

Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

why was the girl unhappy? because she was stapled to a shark.

Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

How do you know when a blonde has been using your computer? If you're lucky some of his or hair will have fallen out and be left on the keyboard as evidence.

What's a group of people that has an N, an I, two Gs, an E and an R that have no souls? Gingers.

What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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