Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food on the other side

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Why did you step on my watermelon?

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Why was the man lying under a sheet. Because he was dead.

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Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

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why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

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Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

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Roses are red Violets are red I have Ebola

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Why was the little boy speechless? His best friend was just run over by a plow truck.

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What happened when Susie fell off the Ferris Wheel? There was an open seat.

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What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Patient: I thonk I'm gonna die Doctor: well will ya hurry up and die already? I've got to treat a kid with a paper cut.

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Q: Why did the son of the dad who went fishing with him die? A: Well, he was either eaten by a shark or drowned while being the bait before that.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they couldn't cross the border.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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Knock knock! Knock knock!! Knock knock!!! Knock knock!!!! WHOSE THERE! Wait its a woodpecker

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Your mamma is so fat that she is undergoing strict diet and exercise in order to reduce the risk of premature death due to health complications.

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womens rights

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Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

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What's worse than anti-jokes? The holocaust.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a canoe at him.

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A guy uses Google locations to find his friend Chuck Norris.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops