Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Because she had no arms!

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How many dead babies can you fit a bathtub??? It depends on how you slice them!

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

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Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

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what does 2+2equals? i think its 3 but i could be wrong

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Why did he chicken cross the road? The suicide rate in chickens has gone up 50% in the past year alone.

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what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

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whats worse than 4 dead monkeys? 5 dead monkeys.

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What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

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Knock knock. Get out!!

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A family walks into a talent agency. Talen agent says "Okay, what's your act called?" Dad replies "The Aristocrats!"

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Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

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Chuck Norris.

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i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

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What is Godzilla's favorite sport? Nothing, Godzilla is a fictional character.

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Why did the German burn the Jew? Because he dropped his tea.

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Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

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What is the sound of one hand clapping? I don't know you have a hand try it yourself lazy prick.

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Q: What's blue, red, and circular? A: I lied about the blue, and... uh... the red and circular part too, but everything else is true. It is an ipod touch.

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What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

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How do you steal from a sushi buffet? You say please.

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I saw a black dude eating fried chicken a white guy said he wanted some but the black guy said don't put your white mayonnaise on my fried delicious KFC fried chicken

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what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

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What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops