Why did the young boy cross the road? because his dad beats him due to alcoholism and his mother is a crack whore.

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why couldnt jimmys feet touch the ground? he was hanging.

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An atom walks into a bar. Did it grow legs?

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what happens when chuck norris loses his hokey-bar? your mother

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Every time I walk across the street I do the Hitler march and raise my arm straight out to salute him, if I feel like holding up traffic, I take smaller steps

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Why did Suzie fall off the swings? Because she didn't have arms or legs. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

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Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face" and the horse says "my wife just died of skin cancer."

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Why do jews have large noses? Genetics.

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What is the worst joke to tell a Orphan? Knock Knock Who's there Not your parents ( Man than slams door in little girls face)

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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What do you call a white guy sitting on a bench? The NBA.

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What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah!

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What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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Why did the plane crash? Because its pilot was a loaf of bread

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Who is it?

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why did u put your iphone in the blender?!?!? because i wanted to make apple juice..

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What do you call a giraffe without a neck? Dead.

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Yo mama is so fat, she needs to get serious about her diet, or else she might die of some sort of weight related issue.

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What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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John has 37 candy bars and eats 36 of them? What does John have? Diabetes, John has Diabetes.

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Why did Hitler kill himself? He saw his gas bill.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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