Your mom is so fat that her every day life if a struggle and she has to get gastric bypass surgery or else she is going to die

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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What do you get when you cross a Minotaur with a snowman? A cold mythological creature.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because seven is a murdering sociopath

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What is worse than the holocaust? DUH! A worm in MY apple!

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when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

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Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death

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Two guys walk into a bar together. They are diagnosed with a concussion and later on in life have serious brain issues

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

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The last joke I tried to submit used "trolololol" as the enter code thing and I spelled it without the extra "lol" The lolz have got me again *this time it asked me for "basket case"

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Me: "If I had Alzheimers, I would break down into tears." Friend: "Why, you would forget why you were crying..." Me: "Who are you again?"

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What Happens if a Muslim boy gives you a bomb? You give it to someone else as your playing tnt tag and the bombs a toy

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Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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Roses are gray Violets are gray I really wish That I wasn't color blind

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[Insert anti-joke here]

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q: Why was the balloon scared of unicorns? A: Buses dont exist therefore the balloon was just insane.

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what do you call a sexy feminist? nothing, there are none

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Chlamydia

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What's Kanye West's goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

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What is big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

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what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

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Why did the aisian man get pulled over? Because he was going over the speed limit .

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I Never apologize, I'm sorry, that's just me

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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