Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? I can't remember. I have amnesia from when I was hit by a bus as a child.

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So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

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how long does it take chuck norris to watch a 24 hour video 24 hours

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Why did the Zombie kill and eat a man? Because it was hungry.

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what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

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Why are they the "living" daylights?

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Q: What did the serail rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

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Why did little Timmy scrape his knee? He was launched off of an aircraft carrier.

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Three blind mice. See how they run. Into things.

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What did the ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved

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Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to commit suicide

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What 10 inches long and wont be getting sucked this valentines day? Whitney Houstons crack pipe

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Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

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Well, I feel that I've stepped outside my comfort zone.

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Rebecca black walked into a bar. She was then escorted out because she is under-aged.

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Why did the mexican go back to mexico? He grew up there

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican; the black man had too much alcohol and the Mexican was the designated driver.

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Why don't woman wear watches? Because there is a clock on the stove!

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what are you mike bibby?

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Oh my god it's the twinkie mobile!

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What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

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why did the pancake eat a spanish holiday? Because a plane crashed into his condominium

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1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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