My grandfather slipped on a banana peel. I helped him up.

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

How many British people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Two. One to screw in the lightbulb, and one to hold the flashlight because the room is probably dark.

Why was the man like a chimp? Because they are 96% genetically identical.

Q: How do you find the population of Mexico? A: Take a census

knock knock who's there? your mom your mom who? I'm sorry to tell your mom is dead :.(

Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and not being funny.

What do you call a black man playing a bass guitar? A bassist.

what did Harold Camping say to the little girl and boy? "You and your parents are going to die today"

How did the deaf girl die? I beeped but she didnt hear me

a blonde girl gets behind the wheel of a car. and drives to her community college for her morning class

How many blond girls does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, it is a faily simple task

So the man goes to the doctor and the doctor tells the man " you will have to quit masturbating " So the man asks " why" And the doctor said " so I can examine you "

Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

Who the hell is Femi Otedola?

Do you want to hear a joke? No.

Q. How do you know when you've had too much too drink? A. Your dead(No because when your dead you can't think.)

Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

What's the difference between a hipster and a steaming pile of shit? Many things.

What is BIG, STIFF, AND FULL OF SEMEN!!!? A SUBMARINE!!!!!!!

What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

What do you get a Jewish boy for Christmas? Nothing he died in 1943!

Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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