How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

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If I earned a dollar for every time you've said, "I'm too old for this sh*t," I wouldn't have made very much money. You are a giraffe.

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Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

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What did Woody say to Buzz? A lot. There were three movies.

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There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Whose there? Obviously not Suzie.

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What did the girl get with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer.

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Q: what did the man say to the woman? A: hi

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What do an airplane and a grape have in common? They both have wings, except the grape.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

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ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Two guys walk into a bar. They are knocked out and rushe to hospital because the bar was metal.

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What do you call a mailman who doesn't deliver mail? Unemployed

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How can humans fly? Well if you run and jump of a cliff...nevermind you would just smash your face on the ground. I guess that isn't technically flying.

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hey hey hey wanna hear a joke.....................................MENS IQ!!!!!!

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Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

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Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

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knock knock whoses there whose home whoses home who? you

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why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

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A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

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What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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