What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "I'm going to kill everyone you've ever loved you fucking cocksucker, you think you can get away with sleeping with my wife? You better think again kiddo I will take away everything from you until you are reduced to a smoldering ruin of what you once was, mark my words bitch."

Truth is Jordan Abu aita has a hairy @ss

roses are red hula is hula when i walk in cass i see a big tula

Why did Stephen hawking walk into A bar? He didn't. This situation is impossible considering the fact that he suffers from a horrible condition causing terrible muscular paralysis preventing him from walking.

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

What do you call a bookstore with explosive offers? Barnes and Cher-Noble.

Yo mama so fat, she suffered a heart attack last week and we are all deeply concerned.

Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

What happened to the boy who stalked the pretty girl? His father raped him and he died in a house fire induced by his overwhelmingly sick love for the taliban

What is yellow and white and goes 150 miles down a railroad track? a duck.

A man goes in to a town on Friday, stays there for 3 days, and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? He's lying,

Why did Bob the Builder die? He had cancer.

I took your mother out for a classy steak dinner. I decided not to call her agian because we weren't very compatible and the conversation was very superficial.

Naturally I meant to say "Its no fun even when they DO scream in pain" below... What do you think I got? Pleasure? Your friendly r*pist Moral Man: Of course I got pleasure! ;) But I wont share with you!

Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because they taste funny.

I baked a pie once. Guess what flavor it was. PIE FLAVOR!

What's the difference between Newt Gingrich's cat and a hand grenade? Gingrich's cat is a domesticated quadriped mammal, a hand grenade is a small bomb that can be thrown by hand

A bus crashes and everybody dies.

John and Marry wanted an abortion. God just laughed And Jesus was born Merry Christmas everyone!

Q.) What do you call a black man on the moon? A.) An astronaut.

What do you call a Koala bear that does not have a chin? A Koala bear.

Roses are red Tulips are blue Wait, no sorry That's violets.

A Rabbi walks into a bar. He does not order any alcoholic beverages, because Orthodox Jews aren't allowed to consume alcohol except for certain times and religious customs.

Your momma's so not fat that when a school bus rolled by here house, she just sat there and turned on oprah.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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