A priest, a Muslim and a Rabbi sit next to each other on a plane they say nothing to each other during the flight and reach their destinations safely.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worse than being forced to drink your own urine and eat a disabled kids poop? James Holmes (Ironic that the text I had to type in to post this was "I'M BATMAN".)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

In space, no one can hear you scream. Which means Xenomorphs are deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why the girl have a crooked leg? Her grandma thought that she was a pretzel and while the girl was sleeping the grandma tried to bend the girls leg into a pretzel shape

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

ask me if im a door yes

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was the black man picking cotton? Because he was in an area where slavery is a socially and morally accepted practice.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what do you call a girl with a pumpkin spice coffee in her hands? Jenifer

thumb_up thumb_down +1

how long does it take chuck norris to watch a 24 hour video 24 hours

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Yo mama is so stupid that see should really be concerned with furthering her education in a four-year university

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? He lost his punch line. -by Ross

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what do you get when a white man and a black woman have a baby? A baby

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I remember in the 80's it felt like Bill Cosby was being shoved down my throat. He was always on TV with his show and those Jello commercials.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did Robin do in between crime fighting? He had a paper route.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

-Is this the Krusty Krab? -Yes, how can I help you?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two babies are playing in a sand box.. They both start crying because they get sand in their eyes

thumb_up thumb_down +1

a man walks into a bar... he was then shot to death because he was a slave in the early 1800s

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops