Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's DEAD!

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Q: what did the old man do to the little boy in his dark cellar while babysitting on a stormy night? A: told him to hold a flashlight because the power went out and he needed to find his electric generator.

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What's more fucked up that the Bill Cosby rape accusations? Sam and Adele's shower time on a Wednesday night

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Two Jews are sitting in a large oven. They realize it is a dangerous place to be and get out of the oven.

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Two black men and a latino board a plane together. They are members of the Marshall High School football team, and all die in the subsequent crash.

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whats hard long and you put it in your mouth everyday a toothbrush

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Why? Why not?

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why did the boy fall to the ground? He was struck by lightning

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What do a plum and a small bunny have in common? There both purple except for the bunny.

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What is computers and smells like thin and fragile? dyslexic nipples.

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If gluttony is a serious sin, why are so many Christians fat? Because they have bad eating habits.

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Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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What did one lawyer say to the other? We are both lawyers. What did the stupid lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both pineapples.

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Why did the woman get into a car accident? She was blind.

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Roses are red violets are blue monkeys like you belong in the zoo but don't be afraid I'll be there to that in the cage but laughing at you

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two kids see a girl naked in the woods They walk away promptly to their homes and tell their mothers.

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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What is long hard and woody? A tree.

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How can you tell if your roomate is gay? If he gets an erection when you have anal sex with him.

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? alot of things, worms don't taste that bad.

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Why was the dyslexic cowboy crying when he came into school that day? He had chronic diarrhea.

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Why did the Muslim cross the road? He was on fire and he needed to get to the lake on the other side of the street to put himself out.

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What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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