A man jumps of the roof of his building. The superindentant now owns the building and the man who jumped off the building has 59 fractures. Oh and he died.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A man walks into a bar wearing large and baggy pants. The bartender asks him, "Why the large, baggy pants?" The man replies, "Because they're comfortable."

thumb_up thumb_down -29

give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the Mexican steal a pack of tortillas? To feed his family. He didn't have the necessary funds to pay for it.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's better than sex? I have never had sex and, therefor, do not have adequate knowledge of the experience enough to make a comparison to other experiences. You should ask someone who has had sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse's mother had terminal cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -29

How do you make a fat man cry? You call him fat.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

You can pick your nose and you can pick your friends but you can't wipe your friends on the couch.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What do you call a bunch of spics playing soccer? Professional soccer players.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

There were two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Does it feel hot in here?". The other muffin says back, "Holy crap! It's a talking muffin!".

thumb_up thumb_down -29

what are you talking about. Nets are terrible. Lakers are going to be the best.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A little boy had a candle by his bedside. It fell over. The candle was fake, and it didn't burn down his house. When he woke up, he picked up the candle, put it back on his nightstand and had a wonderful day.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

thumb_up thumb_down -29

a blonde girl walks into a bar...of soarp, slips, falls, and breaks her spine.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

The other day I went into the bathroom to take a poo, It was Glorious I flushed the toilet and everything.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A man walks into a bar and sees another man crying at the other end he asked what's wrong the man replies well its a long story I have time replyed the other man ok well me and my wife are always arguing. So I divided to go to the library after hours of reading I see a book about history and as im reading it its time to go home and when I was going to check it out I forgot my library card I get home and me and my wife make up and have a baby thats not bad at all said the other man yea you've never lost ur library card

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What is the difference between a urologist and a can of chili? One is hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Hitler has a certain "genocide-quaw" about him

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What was the best part of the holocaust? A: none of it, it was a terrible event in history and hopefully is never repeated

thumb_up thumb_down -31

24

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did Sally fall out of the tree? Because She had no arms or legs... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Knock-Knock? Who's There? Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops