The funniest thing happened the other day, it was like one went like this, and the other went like that, and then everyone laughed... ...Oh, its one of those where you would have had to be there to see how funny it was.

Wayne Rooney's face and intelligence.

How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

"My father walked out on me." "Oh that's strange because I saw him yesterday and he had no legs."

i hate when your sentence doesn't end as you testicle.

Q. What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A. Cancer

Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

:Knock Knock :Don't be stupid there's no door here.

How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

what do you call a farm without animals a house with a big yard

Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

Why did the baby die? Because I refused to feed it.

What can bankrupt people buy? Free stuff.

Blonde Girl: Why is this green-painted man throwing forks at me?! Green-Painted Man: It is confusing you, no?

A horse walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer, the bartender quickly takes out a shot gun and shoots the horse because he is secretly dealing horse meat to tescos

roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

i just cant stand up to cripple jokes

Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

why did the chicken cross the road? there was a black man walking towards him

What do you get when you cross Skyrim and Call of Duty? A video game that has similarities to Skyrim and Call of Duty.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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