Why are you a chicken? Because I say cock-a-doodle doo

Why did the white policeman shoot all the black people in a house and not the white people Because the black guys were holding the white guys hostage

A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

What is better than a 50-inch wide plasma flat screen TV? A 51-inch wide plasma flat screen TV.

Why didn't Suzie answer her mother? Suzie has a serious condition where she is mute and also severely deaf.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

A dog walks into a bar, the bartender asks, "why the long face?" The dog replies, "because I am a dog you idiot, my face always looks like this"

Q. what did the hobo say to the rich guy A. nothing the hobo wa a mute

What happened when Tim's house caught on fire? The fire department was contacted and they put the fire out.

On Friday the 13th,My cat turned into a dog.

Women's Rights

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well he graduated in four years with a degree in chemical engineering. He worked hard all four years in order to keep his scholarship to the university. Now he leads a very successful life and lives in a large house with his wife and two children.

I sas Ratzinger a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

Why'd the cop pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

what happened to the man that got shot.... He died.. 3 secs after

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house..... knock knock! whos there? THE CHICKEN!!

What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I just sharpened this hatchet Don't make me use it!

What did the girl tell her abusive boyfriend Girl: You broke my heart! Boyfriend: I'm gonna break your face.

How Dow you make a baby stop crying?? Hit it with a brick By smash45

How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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