What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

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How do you stop a lumberjack? You thrust a javelin through his lungs

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A kid comes across an injured duck near a lake. Nevermind he doesn't see it he's really high.

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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Q: What would have been the easiest way to stop the second world war without killing anyone? A: Paid Hitler for his art.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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A Jew, black person, and Mexican jump out of a plane, which one falls first? Who cares they all died

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Knock knock! Just kidding.

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A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hey, I like your shirt.

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What did the woman say to the man before she had sex with him? "May I have sex with you, please?"

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I don't often drink beer, but when I do, I make the poor decision to attempt to drive while intoxicated, kill a pedestrian, and end up in jail with a hangover, a DUI, and an account of vehicular homicide. Don't drink and drive simultaneously.

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Why is a bird when it flies? Because the higher it goes the much.

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Q: What did the homeless man get on his Birthday? A: Hypothermia.

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Yo Momma is Like a Prostitute... ...I pay her for sexual intecourse

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A boy plays in his garden. Then he fall and his knee hurts a lot, but he doesn't cry. Do you know why? Because he's dead.

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What did the homeless kid get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

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Do you believe in love at first site? Or should I walk by again?

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Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

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What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

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Q. bob had 93 chocolate bars and ate 74 what does he have now? A. diabetes

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Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

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Your momma smells so bad that she purchased arm and hammer products to improve upon her natural scent.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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