An Irishman walked out of a bar

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a blonde walks in to a bar, the bar tender gives him a free drink because he's a man and it's nazi germany

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So this chick meets a guy at a bar. They never greet each other and the drive home sober.

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Those who believe that Sarah Palin is dumb are living in some fantasyland. She could damn well speak as much as anyone else!

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How do you stop a baby from spinning round a washing line. Hit it in face with a baseball bat.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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A man is standing on the street corner waiting for the bus. As it pulls up he steps on and pays his fare while he whistles to his iPod.

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whats the difrence between santa clause and a jew santa goes down the chimney

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

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Whats gayer then dancing with the stars? Justin beiber

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

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Q) How many times did the woman jump off the cliff? A) Once she died.

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How to smash an apple Iphone <<<<<< Use A Hammer >>>>>>> PS : if u want to break a hammer use an iphone

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Atheism

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A man walks into a bar. Since he was only moving at a slow walking pace, he was fine, no further events worth noting occured.

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Barny the purple dinosaur has no imagination, stuck his finger up his ass and called it masterbaition!

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My wife's star sign was Cancer and its quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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2 Priests and a Monk walk into a bar, All 3 were stabbed to death in a bar fight.

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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What is cowboy say

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a horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" Then the horse left because that question is racist to horses.

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What's worse than a real joke on AntiJoke? The Holocaust

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If omar has 7 apples and his bus is 7 minutes early, what is the mass of the sun? Pi. Partially because the piece of paper couldnt dance with your mother.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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