How do you kill a jew? Same way you would anyone

Jerry Sandusky walks into an Under 21

whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

What's wrong with black people? They tend to make mistakes, as do all humans

An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

Whats the difference between a penis and a vagina? Pancakes,

Dam. Mothers Against Dyslexia.

why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

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Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

How long does it take for a black woman to have a shit. 9 months.

what do you get a man with no arms or legs for his birthday? a quick, painless death.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because there were no cars in the way.

What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

what do you call a middle-aged man with one blue suede shoe on, purple hair, pink skin, white eyes, no toenails, 67 fingers, 1 eye, a pocket watch, no clothes, and 8978967564567898765432345678765321234568909876543w245678909876543456098765323456-0987654367890-098765435678-09876543456789098765432345678909876543456789098765435678909876543234567898765323456890-987654345678900987654323456890987653234567890765434568909876543456899876543456789098765434568909876545678987654345678987654567898765434567898765478579458765456789876543223456789876543098765432123456898765432678987654230987653-098765434567898765434898765434567898765456787654567876 butt cheeks? bob.

Paul was mowing his lawn when he felt a bump. It turned out it was a bunny. Paul felt bad but the bunny felt worse

two elephants in a bathtub Elephant 1: pass me the soap Elephant 2: no, radio!

How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

Knock, knock. MAN: Who's there? ... MAN: Hello? Anyone out there? ... MAN: Must be the wind.

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

A princess kisses a frog to acquire a prince. Then gets arrested for beastiality.

Tim and Jim are Telling Jokes Tim: Knock Knock ... Jim does not respond because Tim has a mental disorder causing him to believe in hypothetical doors and thus ignores him so that he does not upset his friend

One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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