american idol

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What do you call a black guy in a Walmart? A customer. You prejudice dullard!

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A man travels to the park, and kills a person, throws them in a bag and runs away. He then travels to the grocery store, kills 2 people, throws them in a bag and walks away. He then travels to the gas station, kills 3 people and walks away. He keeps traveling around killing people until he has claimed 69 victims in all. From this, we can infer that he was a psychotic murderer with a perverted sense of humor.

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Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

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What did the hedgehog say to the beaver? Nothing, they can't talk.

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I went to school. Then I came home.

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why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

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what do u say when u steal something? STOLEN!!!!!!!!!

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what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

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what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

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A dancer walks into a barre

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I was hungrey then i saw a man puke. Im still very hungrey. Then i threw up. Im not so hungrey

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So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

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what did the handicap, gimp kid get on his test? I cant tell you.

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Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

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Why was little Mat petting his dog? Just kidding his dog died in a house fire... so did little Mat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops