what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

Whats more dangerous then a man with a gun? two men with guns.

What was the last thing that went through the WTC jumper's head? His ankles.

******************************************************** Okay, so there were two muffins in the oven. One muffin said, "Oh my gosh! We're gonna die!" The other muffin said, "Whoa a talking muffin!" **********************************************************

Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Roses are red Violets are blue. most poems rhyme but this one doesn't!

A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

Did you hear about the kid from Oklahoma? No. Yeah, he died.

What's funnier than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? Nothing, infant mortality is not a laughing matter.

John had 50 candy bars and he ate 45 what does he have...... Diabeaties

An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

what do u call a kid at school a school kid and i have enough of these anti jokes they are not funny

i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

why did the chicken cross the road? there was a black man walking towards him

woman's rights

If a bunch of midgets do the wave, is it a ripple ?

What happens when you mix mints with fizzy drinks Blast off

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

Two muffins are in the oven They didn't say anything.

What's grammatically incorrect about this sentence? Nothing. I lied.

What did the boob say to the bra? sup bra

A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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