What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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How do you make an ugly person not ugly? Put a bag over their head. With,, a smiley face.

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a man checks his mypsace

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Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Everything.

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roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

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Why was the baby crying? Because he was tied to a railroad track. How did the baby die? He had a bomb strapped to him. How did the bomb explode? It got ran over by a train.

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Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

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What do you call a dog that acts like a cat, likes to pretend he's human, and whose name is "Moose"? A dog. His personality traits have no effect on the changing of his species.

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The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

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A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

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what did the white man call a black man that was awarded the job he applied for? He stated the man was a hard worker and deserved the job. Then he walked up to the man with a smile and congraduated him. Then he went home and commited suicide after he concluded he didnt deserve to live.

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Caner.

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How many owls can you fit in a bath tub?

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What has two legs and oinks? Half a pig.

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A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

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Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's. Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's.

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do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

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Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

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knock knock who's there? A worm, your dead in a coffin.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

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A man walks into a bar and sees that the pianist is just twelve inches tall. He asks the bartender, ''How come you have a 12-inch pianist?'' The bartender replies, ''We have a genie in the back room. He'll answer all your wishes, but be careful, because he has a little trouble hearing.'' The man walks into the back room and asks the genie for a million bucks. The genie then gives him a million ducks. The man comes out and tells the bartender that the genie misheard his wish. The bartender says, ''Come on, now! Do you really think I asked for a 12-inch pianist?!''

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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