Why was the new born on the orphanage's doorstep? He was an accident.

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what's the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? dolphins aren't ghosts!!

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Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

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What do you do when a burglar breaks into your house and tries to kill and rape you and you family? Nothing, he as an AK-47 and shoots you all dead and then has sex with your corpses.

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…What did you put in the drink that made me fart, and kill my horse?

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A: Knock Knock B: 7

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Two antennas falls in love. They get married. The wedding was horrible, but the reception was great.

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Steve: Ask me if I'm a tree. John: Are you a tree? Steve: No.

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A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" the bartender asks. The horse kills everyone in the bar and stampedes the other horses into town.

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I went to the doctor and explained to him, "My penis fell off." The doctor gives me an odd look, and then chops his off to make me feel better.

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What's the difference between a mac and a pc? Well haven't you seen the commercials.

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Roses are blue Violets are unicorns This doesn't make sense Refrigerator

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Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attached to a bomb filled with spoons

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I am back with more jokes! -Lets go Mets It is best to dislike this one

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Get on the boat.

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Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

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What did the disabled kid do on friday? He fell down a flight of stairs.

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An anti-joke

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Man says, "Hello" Girl, "Do you wanna go out?" Man, "With you?" Girl, "YES!" Man, "NO, bye!"

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What do you call a boomerang that wont come back? Broken.

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what is the best part about sleeping with twenty six year olds? they are usually very experienced in sexual intercourse so there isn't much awkwardness

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roses are red, violets are blue, i dont like to rhyme, but i do like to poo.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge asked "Mum, why is my name Fridge?" to which she replied "Because you deserve to be in one."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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