eat a hot dog

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What's the difference between an Asian bookkeeper and a Jewish dog? This isn't a joke, it's an assignment for school, I need to write a 3 page paper on this. Any ideas?

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What did the bartender say to the three-legged Irishman? What can I get you?

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What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

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why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease, an STD from the chicken, as the chicken is a pimp) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

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Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

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What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

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What is red and cry's? A baby chewing on a razor blade

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whats black and white and red all over? ...a nun in a blender

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

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Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

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What's the difference between an airplane and a cantaloupe? What? Wow your a dumby head.

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Why didn't jimmy get to eat his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

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Why was the girl distressed by the photo of her boyfriend's mutilated corpse? Because it was out of focus.

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A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

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A man goes into a bar. He leaves drunk and beats his wife to death and burns the house and kids.

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roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

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How do you help a black person find a job ? Tell them places that are hiring.

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Why was Billy's grandma not around for Thanksgiving? Because she's dead

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Roses are red I got a new phone But no one to text Forever alone

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How do you kill a blonde? You stab her many times in the ear with a fork......Then finsih her off with a spoon. No knives those hurts

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Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops