Q. Why did the lotion soothe the person's skin? A. Because its ingredients were selected because of their propensity to soothe skin.

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Why was the man worried? because he had a shotgun up his ass

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why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black guy on a bike? Just because its not very nice.

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Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Charles. Charles who? It's your brother Charles. I came straight here from the doctor. I was just diagnosed with stage 4 testicular cancer.

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If you can fit many clowns in a car and many mexicans in a car...how many mexican clowns will fit?

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Did you see Stevie wonders house? Neither did he.

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What is the name of the mermaid on the Starbucks logo? No one knows, she ran away many years ago of shame. It's undiscovered why.

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You know what's funny about Fox news? Nothing. Lying to the public isn't funny at all.

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

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How many Russians can you fit in a Mini Cooper? It depends on how big they are.

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A man walks into a bar. He hasn't been there before, and it's a Friday so it's really crowded, and it's really quite a dive, so he and his girlfriend decide to leave and find somewhere else to eat.

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How can you tell if a woman is stupid? Yell the word "STUPID'' and see if she turns around.

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first

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What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

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How does God choose who goes to heaven? I'm just kidding, there's no God.

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A Finnish guy and a Russian guy go into a sauna. The Russian died.

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Q: Why didn't Little Jhonny go to school today? A: There was no school today.

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whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

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Why should you be scared when a black man asks you, "What are looking at?" Because if he is over the age of 18, he should know better than to end a sentence with a preposition, unless of course, he never had an education, in which case... you should probably run for your life.

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How do you piss off a redneck? You wait until he is done fucking his sister and then you steal his truck.

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How did the Mexican got into the USA? Trough the border.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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