A guy walks into a bar carrying an octopus under his arm. The bartender asks him, "say, buddy, what's with the octopus?" and the man replies, "this is the most intelligent octopus in the world. In fact, I bet you $100 that it can play any instrument you give it." The bartender snickers at the other patrons, and puts $100 on the bar. He motions the man over to the piano by the wall. The man puts the octopus on the piano, but nothing happens. The octopus is dead, because it's been out of the water for a while. The bartender looks at the man sadly, as two psychiatric orderlies from the local mental hospital take the visitor away to the looney bin, after another patron called the police. The bartender never gets his $100, and now he has to clean up the godawful mess on his piano.?

If you pull a pin out of a grenade, is it possible to put it back? I need a quick answer for this question.

There are 3 people in a car, shit, manners, and asshole. They are driving and shit falls out. They pull over and manners gets out to help shit. Then a cop comes and pulls them over. The cop ask asshole what his name is. He said asshole. The cop said what. Then asshole said asshole. Then the cop says where are your manners. Asshole said over their picking up shit.

Why was the boy afraid? Because he had just seen his dog get ran over by a tractor

What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

My name is Will I am a real homosexual

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how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

Yo momma so fat, she's dead.

Knock Knock who's there? Steve Steve who? Steve. I already told you my name.

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

Good job, son.

Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

the bully said, you're just small fries. the fries couldn't help it someone ordered a small!

why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

What's black an blue and doesn't like sex? The 8year old in my trunk.

knock knock whos there. no one your hullicinating, heroine is hell of a drug

Why did the chicken cross the road? It escaped.

Q: What do you do when the light burns out A: Just replace it with a bulb from a less used room

How many Jews can you fit in a car? Statistically speaking, in a brief survey done by the United States Traffic Commission, they stated that a standard 4-door sedan had the highest percentile of drivers. So, in regards to the legal system, a person may only fit, in fact, 5 jews in a car.

A:why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side =D B:...i dont think you fully grasp the concept of an anti joke yet...smh -.-

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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