bob said "Hi Joe why the long face" Joe replies "I'm a horse dip sh*t"

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What do you call dinosaur flatulence? Jurassic Fart!

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How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

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What was the fly doing in the soup? Nothing, the guy ordered pizza.

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Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

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A man and a woman meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony was rubbish but the reception was brilliant

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Why was Nathan upset Because his sister died from an undiagnosed case of tuberculosis

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What's worst then leaving a public toilet when you just took a shit and the toilet is now clogged Realising that the maid was waiting for you to get out to clean the toilet...

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

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what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

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Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

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what do you make if you get a cow, then kill it. ...Steak

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I asked her where you were.

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What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

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so there was a frog a bear and a walrus... i forgot how the rest goes but they all die because of a nuclear holocaust

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Whats funny? Your face.

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How do you keep the crime rate down in a black neighborhood? Blow everybody up all at one time.

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well use a tissue!

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"Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave."

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The other day I went into the bathroom to take a poo, It was Glorious I flushed the toilet and everything.

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Why could a fat man not do a barrel roll? He has already to many rolls.

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a blonde girl walks into a bar...of soarp, slips, falls, and breaks her spine.

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What's worse then getting a broken bone? A large marsupial charging at you with vicious speed

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Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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