Why do girls swim naked in lakes and oceans? so they have an excuse why their pussies smell like either tuna or cat fish.

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Why did the man hit the little boy? His brakes failed.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Why was the man arrested? He assaulted and raped an elderly woman at the local Walmart. He then proceeded to hijack the poor woman's Scooter and lead police on a 4 mile long car chase.

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Q: Why was the man wet? A: I push him in a pool.

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What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

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Why does Tim Teblow love men? Logan Cole told him to.

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So I saw my asian friend at the beach on a really sunny day, so I said hi.

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What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

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What has three legs, one eye, and is green and fuzzy. I don't know. Me either.

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What's black and white and red all over? A seriously infected scab.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I have a gun. Get in the car.

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Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

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Somebody stole my goat, now I can't enter it in the fair

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In soviet Russia...things are different

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Bang Bang Get the hell out of the house, it's on fire.

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A man dressed as a woman gets hit in the nuts they fall to the ground in pain

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What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

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Jesse likes to jack off and lick the white stuff off of his balls and digest it

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Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

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An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

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What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

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Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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