A dog walks up to a puddle of pee and he starts to smell it

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Q: How did the black guy die? A: After a long battle with a terrible case of pneumonia he struggled to breath and died a slow and peaceful death... R.I.P. Dad

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two guys r talking and the one said *i swear to god* and the other one said *u swear what to god what the hell r u talking about i dont even know u*

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Q: What's worse than a paper cut? A: 9/11

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A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

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How often does the lesbian vampire group meet up? Never. Lesbians don't exist.

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What did one cow say to the other cow? Moo

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What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

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Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

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Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

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What do you call a jew without a nose? A most likely kind and interesting anti- steriotypical person

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Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

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What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

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A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

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What did one alien say to another alien? I miss Mexico.

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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Your mother is so heavy that she decided to try out nutrisystem

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What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

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How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

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women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

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What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket. What's blue and looks like a bucket? A red bucket in disguise.

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when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

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Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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