Q: Where does the queen of england live? A: This was the question I had to anwser to be able to post this joke.

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

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Why did Timmy masticate in front of everyone at the dinner table? If he hadn't, he would have choked on large chunks of food.

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knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

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What do you call a school bus full of black people? A school bus

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What is worse than getting shot in the leg? Getting shot in the head.

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What happens when Lord Voldemort tries to kill Harry Potter? He is unsuccessful.

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What do you call a Mexican guy in America? A Mexican American

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I can't wait to shove my finge in you

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She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

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Mugger: Give me all your money. Victim: No. Mugger: Okay. (Moves on to find his next victim)

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what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

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Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

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Q: How did the robber steal a laptop from best buy? A: With his hands

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? A: The holocaust

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Whats the best day of the week? Sponge

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

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Tall asians

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Why did the chicken not make it across the road? Because he got hit by a transport.

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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Your momma's eyesight is so weak she needs a pair of glasses to see properly

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What do you call a skeleton in your closet? Evidence of a brutal crime. You should probably call the cops.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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