what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have said two factual statements.

Why did your mom fall off the swing? I shot him.

Q: Why was little Timmy afraid of clowns? A: The one at his birthday party killed his parents.

Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

whats worse than a pile of dead babies?...... A carrot

This is an anti-joke. It is not funny because "anti" means the opposite of something.

what happens when you shoot a piece of soup It dies

A banker makes some poor economic investments with other people's money. turns out the people can never get the money back. the banker walks away like nothing happened. the government does nothing to prosecute the man. Somewhere in there his wife leaves him.

Tim and Jim are Telling Jokes Tim: Knock Knock ... Jim does not respond because Tim has a mental disorder causing him to believe in hypothetical doors and thus ignores him so that he does not upset his friend

A man is sitting on a park bench crying. A blonde walks by and asks him why he's sad. The man proceeds to explain he just lost his children in a custody battle with his ex wife.

Q: Why did the black man die poor? A: Because he was financially irresponsible and wasted the millions left to him by his father fueling his alcohol addiction, slowly grinding away at his organs until he died of cirrhosis of the liver.

A man walks into the bathroom. He dumps cat shit all over the floor

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

What kind of king has 2 heads? A card!

What's black, white, and red all over? An African American and Caucasian man painting a house with red paint and accidentally spilling some on themselves

Whats 1 foot long and went in and out of my girlfriend? Our new baby

no

how man

Where is aodhan's ma? Jail, she was cought with a bag full of the white powder.

Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

YOU

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...