Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple Finding half a worm in your apple .....

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What's the thing that freaks guys out the most? When you're about to have sex with a girl and it turns out she had a penis and it's bigger than yours

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. The rabbi says "ow my head"

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Whats big and blue and white and if it falls from a tree its sure to kill you. A fridge with a denim jacket on.

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hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

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knock knock who's there funny funny who a funny joke

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THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

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How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? AIDS

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was shot in the head. Plus the fact that it was his first attempt on a bike made it highly unlikely to succeed anyway.

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither, many scientists believe that the first living organisms on Earth were single-celled, prokaryotic bacteria.

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knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out the chamber.

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Racial equality.

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What did the cat say to the chicken? Meow

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "I have a gambling problem."

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A black man and a Mexican man are in the back of a car. Who's driving? Not enough information to answer this question.

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i like it in the mouth

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I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

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why did the man turn on and off the lights 20 times because he was diagnosed with O.C.D as a child

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What's blue? The sky.

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what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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