What's long and black The unemployment line

Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

What did the clown say when he was denied health insurance? Nothing, he died of his pre-existing heart condition.

Albino African Americans

A man walks outside and sits down to eat his sandwich.

why should you not go to sleep in public? Because that's how you get raped.

I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

Roses are dead Violets are dead I'm a terrible gardener.

Why do new moms put "BABY ON BOARD" stickers on the backs of their cars? No reason. Hitting someone's car baby inside or not is against the law and very dangerous for passengers of any age.

Why are gay guys so good at being gay? The black guys told them too.

A blind man walks into a bar, and a table, and a chair.

Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

What do you call a fridge painted red and brown? A fridge.

What did the zero say to the eight? I don't know,numbers are inanimate objects so they can't talk.God, what did you think?

What do you call a window you can see throu? A window.

Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

Is Barack Obama a dentist, a teacher, or the president of the United States? A dentist. He just happens to have the same name as the president.

What's worse than the holocaust? Microwaveable jellied horse nipple

roses are red, violets are blue, poems are stupid, refridgerator

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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