Q: what comes after 69? A: 70

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Stalin and Hitler went to Kmart to buy mini-toothpaste. Because they schleifen schlafanned on their way to the country club.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his soon to be butchered family.

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Why did a little kid's mom let go of his hand? John Wilks Booth shot her

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How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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I'm called the! no i wish am I left

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Did you know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes

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q; whats small and high pitched a; rory johnston

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Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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What happened to the boy with no family? He died in a tragic car accident along with his family

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Fact: Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people one will always disagree with the other nine.

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Yo mama's so white that she has to use lots of sunscreen to prevent from getting sunburned.

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What is fat and ginger? No...Not Garfield...Rebeka Tims

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a tree There isn't a tree in my garage

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roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

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Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

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roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

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We are few Nero, too few, if I want to split my money with you, would it help you find true happiness?

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What did the gay man receive for christmas? AIDS

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A) The color of their hair.

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What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in circle.

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How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops