q; whats small and high pitched a; rory johnston

Why did a little kid's mom let go of his hand? John Wilks Booth shot her

Stalin and Hitler went to Kmart to buy mini-toothpaste. Because they schleifen schlafanned on their way to the country club.

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

What happened to the boy with no family? He died in a tragic car accident along with his family

What do you call a fat ginger kid? Whatever his name is.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

Why did the black man go to the back of the bus? The only unoccupied seats were back there.

What stops a train? A missile

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit her in the face with a ax!

Knock knock. Who's there? Stop fucking around I told you I was coming. I'm sorry. Come in.

A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

I don't have friends, so I'm anti-social.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in circle.

Whats white and sticky? Glue.

knock knock! who's there? me.(walks away...)

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A) The color of their hair.

why did Dayrl win the wheelchair race? Because he had working legs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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