How do you call a black person in KFC? By a Phone.

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The umpire asked the baseball coach "Who is that on 1st base?" The baseball coach said "Who." The umpire said "Yes, that's what I'm asking." The baseball coach handed the umpire a list of his players to avoid any further confusion.

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How did the Jewish man play racquetball? With a racket and a birdie.

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Whats the difference between a dog and a piranha? Their names.

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What did one ginger say to the other? W are both gingers.

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Your momma is so fat, she doesn't have a birthday. She has a birthweek.

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You take a survey of all citizens that live in the country of Mexico, find the wealth of each individual person, and whoever has the most money is the richest person in Mexico.

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I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

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How do you make a mailman cry? Kill his family.

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies in a truck? A: A pile of dead babies in a truck with one alive in the middle eating his way out.

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What do you get when you cross a gay man with a chainsaw? A decapitated homosexual.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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What's another word for Manslaughter? My new Hobby

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Why did the guy lose the race? Because he had explosive diarrhea

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Person 1 - Did you know there is only evidents of killer whales killing in captivity Person 2 - tell that to my uncle Pete... He's deaf

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knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

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Why did bethany fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Bethany

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Jim: You wanna hear a funny joke? Tim: Sure Jim: Well, if you want a funny joke, this isn't the place to be.

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How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

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Once a upon a time there was a boy whom likes cheese. The boy: I like Cheese and thats the end of the story

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What time is it? If I hadn't poked your eyes out, you might know.

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Want to hear a joke? No.

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How did the car get a dent? Terrorists bombed the house next to it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops