What's black and blue and made of poo? A drowning black guy, holding some blue poop

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car.

What's up? Your time.

Yo Dawg, I heard You Like Kittens and Volcanoes... So, I threw Your Kitten In A Volcano.

What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

When's the worst time to use skin moisturizer? When you're a burn victim.

your mom gave me head.....phones

How much cabbage is in sean's teeth? lots, like it's rotting in there

What do you call a rabbit with carrots in its ears? Anything, it can't hear you!

How do you stop a baby from spinning round a washing line. Hit it in face with a baseball bat.

The frightened girl did everything the man said. " Open your legs. Bend over..." She was playing Simon says and was afraid to loose. It wasn't sexual abuse, which her sister had experienced while traveling around the world in 2007.

A man and a women are having sex. He farted so she left before he came.

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

First speaker: "why are there so many anti-jokes about something walking into a bar!?!? Second speaker: "there are only a couple thousand of them." First speaker: "it is getting so damn annoying!" Second speaker: "Well, that's too bad for you" The first speaker proceeds in stabbing himself with a knife while laughing hysterecly. First speaker: "ha ha ha ha" Second speaker "emo."

How do you get a baby out of the blender? Pour it

her: what did your last slave die of? him: syphillis

When the sun goes down... Most of the guys pants goes down too. Just be straight XD

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police your parents just died in a car accident

Why was the man sad? His brother died.

what happens when a migit and a horse have sex..... probably nothing

How do you knock a cat out of a tree? If that doesn't work, use a lethal BB gun

How did the black kid pass his exam? He studied.

What`s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff What did the banana say to the ear? Hello

Why couldn't little Jimmy play catch with his dad? Because he was an orphan.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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