What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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cerleb i wrote the one about melons!

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charlie sheen becomes sober.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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what did the boy who liked trucks get for his birthday? POOP

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How do you put a baby to sleep? Snap its neck.

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Why did a jew die? It got killed by a nazi.

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Whats black and yellow and makes you laugh? A bus full of niggers driving of a cliff

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Remember Y2K? That could have been bad.

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I can still remember the last words my brother said before he kicked the bucket. "Hey you guys,how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

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What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

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old man: hi old woman: i have alshemiers old man: hi old woman: i have alshemiers

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Knock knock. I have a doorbell...

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How many Polacks does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to change the lightbulb, one to hold the ladder.

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Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

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Policeman: Knock, knock. Woman: Who's there? Policeman: The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your husband has been killed.

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united we sit, cause we're fat

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WHATS BROWN AND SMELLS LIKE CRAP!?!?!?!?!?!?!? crap

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Person: Hello Parking Meter! Parking Meter: Hello! The person then backed away in fear

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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sadf

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This joke might just be dumb enough for YOU to find funny

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XD I TOTALLY CANT BELIEVE I FELL FOR THAT ONE! XD IT WAS LIKE SO OBVIOUS! XD

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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