Knock knock Who's there? *silence* WHO'S THERE? *silence* -Looks out window- Slenderman

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what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

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Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

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Why did the Jewish population diminish in the '40s? Showers and Ovens

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whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

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What's black and white and in the desert? Tourists being held hostage by a tribe.

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why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by the ice cream van

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whats worse than getting bit by a tick. getting bit by a deer tick that as lyme disease.

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Why did the bakery run out of the business? They weren't making enough dough

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Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

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What do you call a black man with no legs? A fine example of the consequences of drink driving. Make sure you are physically stable or not under the effects of depressants, drugs or any form of alcohol before deciding to use a motor vehicle.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

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A smiling Frog talks with a lion O O U What do u eat for breakfast lion? V V T T Smiling frogs __(___ |____| O O -

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What do you call a half man half manatee? A manatee

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Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

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OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

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Why did the prostitute begin to cry when she saw the chinese patron's penis? His testicles are diced onions.

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Mum did you make my milkshake? No, I didn't son, but your father did. Fther's dead. I know.

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If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

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When the sun goes down... Most of the guys pants goes down too. Just be straight XD

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my life didn't start, until I met you! :) Megan _____

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Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his forehead. Why did the little boy have a frog stapled to his forehead? Because Johnny just can't drive. Why can't Johnny drive? He has no arms and legs. Why does Johnny have no arms and legs? Cause Johnny is a potato! Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? Because he got ran over by a bus. But who was driving the bus? Johnny the potato!

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Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

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If you die, and have 5 cents in your pocket, does the toast still land jelly side down?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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