Why do the Chinese eat cats? Because it is a good source of protein that is relatively easy to obtain. Really, it's not much different than killing pigs for food.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Life on the line? I just do it for the kill and the potential savage rape and consumption! And yeah, a man is not a man but a boy if he cant protect his lady friends. HEY WAIT A FUCKING MOMENT! Why you playing so hard to get now? YOUR FLESH IS MINE! It is just like a billion pages ago where we where talking VERY down and dirty.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are red, violets are blue No they're not, violets are violet

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Justin Bieber walks into a bar, has a few drinks, chats with some fans, and leaves. The very next day, Justin Bieber is out buying groceries.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Hey, did you see that episode of Glee last night? It was awesome! Especially that scene where they all sang. It wasn't as good as the previous ones, but I think the show it making a comeback.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why did suzie fall off the swing? because shes autistic and her mother likes to abuse her.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered SIX offender

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did Joe get for his first birthday? Nothing he died at birth

thumb_up thumb_down -10

roses are red poo is poo

thumb_up thumb_down -10

p

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the Blonde do when she saw train tracks? She walked over slowly, looked both ways, and crossed safely

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How does a bird grow gills if you're riding a peanut. A fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you say to a cat with a helmet on? Silly cat, you rhyme with hat but you shouldn't wear one.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I was lying in bed looking at the stars in the sky What did i think to myself? Were the heck is the ceiling???

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a guy who likes men? Gay

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did they name the team mavericks and why Was the maskot a horse? Because 50 years ago they found a blue horse And its name was maverick

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call it when a black man kills an Asian man? Murder.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops