BRANDON LUI ROCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

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An englishman, a scotsman and an irishman walk into a bar together. They sit down at the bar, and the barman says, "What is this, some kind of joke?!"

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Why did Kallum come to Getaway? Because he ran out of hats

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Woody Allen once said, "I have had many romantic relationships in my life that were both complex and humorous."

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in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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How do you make lady gaga cry? Give her bad romance haven't you heard this joke before......DUMBASS

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Why was the little girl sad? She had a grown man sexually assault her.

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Why did the white policeman shoot all the black people in a house and not the white people Because the black guys were holding the white guys hostage

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What did the 3 month old puppy get for Valentines day? Heart Worms. What'd he get for Christmas? Put down.

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Why did the black man break up with his white girlfriend? Because he didn't love her anymore.

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What's more funny than 10 dead babies in the bottom of a trash can? 1 dead baby in the bottom of 10 trash cans...

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What shoots rockets but is not classed as a deadly weapon? A toy rocket launcher, I lied about the rockets.

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what did the guy say on friday ? ah man im so glad its not monday tuesday wednesday thursday friday saturday sunday he then threw a horse at a plane while moonwalking on a star that was riding a duck that was on a rabbit. Sir jumpalot was working overtime as he had to pay for a free phone

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why did the little girl fall of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Women don't have penises. Am I the only one who can't get over how WEIRD that is?!?!?

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I rode in to town on an ass... ur momas ass!!

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roses are red violets are blue get to close to me ill have to give aids to you!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The Police. She told me she was nineteen.

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Q:What's the difference between a lake? A: a tree, because motorcycles dont have doors... :) crf

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What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

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Why did the Mexican jump of the roof? Because he had a serious meth addiction that was destroying his family and he could not live with the awful things he did to get his fix.

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what did the boy say to the alien? ET i will protect you. The alien slaps him for being stupid

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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