What's the opposite of a joke? An anti-joke. You're reading one right now.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what do you get when you combine an astronaut, a microwave and a bathtub? A suicide investigation

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A nun walks into a bar. She is immediately excommunicated.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A gay man kisses a gay man and therefore is considered gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

If i had a dollar for every time Lindsay Lohan Crashed a vehicle......i would be rich

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I once met a giraffe, It needed a bath, When I turned on the water, It started to swim, Because it was actually a fish.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Man- Where can I find a book on the holocaust Book keeper- Have you tried comedy? Man- no I havent Book keeper- good it won't be there

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the Taxi crash? The cab driver was trying to remove the frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? a horse

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the korean say to the other korean. I don't know i dont speak korean.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Ammy Winehouse walks into a bar Don't you said we should stop jocking about dead people ?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did spock look in the toilet he was concerned with his poop

thumb_up thumb_down -9

There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally. Why did Sally fall of the swings? She had no arms. Why didn't Jimmy help her up? Jimmy is a fish. There's a guy with no arms and no legs who loves to swim. What's his name? Bob. Ya know Bob's twin brother is in the same condition. He loves to play in the leaves. And what's his name? Russell. Why couldn't Sally swing on the swing? She had no arms. What did the girls mom tell her to do before she went to bed? Go to bed. How do you wake up Will Ferrell? You set his alarm clock to a reasonable hour. What did the fat man who had his car stolen tell the police? Someone stole my car.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the black man say when he met a white man in the street? "Hello, how are you?"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

An Italian, a Mexican, and an American are eating lunch on a bridge. The Mexican drops his taco off the side of the bridge and the Italian and American were kind enough to share some of their lunch with the Mexican making it a successful picnic. Their ethnicity was not relevent at all.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man walks into a doctors office and waits for his turn. After his name was called he walked up to the doctor and told him that he kept having hallucinations. The doctor prescribed an antibiotic to help with the mans addiction to LSD.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A stipper walked into a club, though it was a golf club so she tripped and cracked her skull on it.The end.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a disease caused by an uncontrolled division of abnormal cells in a part of the body? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

two friends are hanging out, one says to the other "whats 5 plus 5" the other says, "you know i didnt finish school and i dont appriceate you making fun of me" the other boy looks away and walks off

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Man 1: Is your refrigerator running? Man 2: Nope, broke last week.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What happened to the child who was rushed into hospital with a deadly disease? He pulled through. I'ts depressing to be constantly hearing sad anti jokes, so here is a nice one. The child in question lived to eighty one, had a great life and a good job. See, it's nice to read a happy anti joke!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

One day a black man went and bought a car with his own hard-earned money.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why do people laugh at anti-jokes? Because of a chemical reaction to a neurological phenomenon that results from the brain's response to external stimuli.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops