What color is an orange chicken? Fried rice

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What's even funnier than 24? A clown in a tree.

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Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

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What is worse than ten dead babies nailed to a tree? The holocaust.

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Eating the apple.

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One man asked another man what his favorite sport was. The man replied: " My favorite sport is golf." "Golf requires no physical strength, therefore I do not count it as a sport." Said the man who asked the question.

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What's the difference between epistemological pluralism.

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There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

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How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

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So a man walks into a bar... ouch

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What's the difference between an alien and Obama? - Nothing they are both aliens.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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no pen = no studying no studying = bad grades bad grades = no job no job = no money no money = no food no food = death DON'T LOSE YOUR PEN

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Your mom is so old that her organs are starting to slowly fail and she must be put on life support or she'll die.

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What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

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Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

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How did the fat guy survive the plane crash? Because he still in the food court at the airport.

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How does a black guy die? He doesn't , he's black

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Why did the bartender leave the bar? He worked really long hours and finally needed some time to sleep.

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Yo mama's so fat that when she goes into a clothing store, she often feels self-conscious about having to buy larger than average clothing sizes than most people.

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Three guys went hunting on a rainy day. The first guy slipped.

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How can you help Sally who is casually gets beaten by her farther every day? Just give £3 a month to the NSPCC

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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